Skip to main content

The Coconut On The Head Of Nigerian Christianity - By Pius Adesanmi

Mrs. Bolanle Ambode, Gov's wife
The media is reporting that Ogbeni Ambode fired a Chaplain for not anointing his wife first or something to that effect.

Ambode versus Chaplain... 
The media is reporting that Ogbeni Ambode fired a Chaplain for not anointing his wife first or something to that effect. I haven't seen Ambode's denial or clarification. I haven't heard his own side of the story. We also haven't heard from Mrs. Ambode.

If the available and, as yet, uncontested version of this story is true, it is a case of Gambari pa Fulani. I don't see why ordinary Nigerians should be unduly exercised, expending valuable energy on a family affair between Nigerian Christendom and power. Go and spend your energy on coping with the recession and stop trying to take sides between Ambode and a Pastor.

What exactly does Nigerian Christendom expect from a Frankenstein she has created and nursed since the 80s? I've been criticized for writing that Christianity died in Nigeria somewhere before the mid-80s.

The beginning of polygamy for Nigerian Christendom. Unable to divorce from the Bible, Nigerian Christianity took a second wife: the politician, the man of power.

First wife - the Bible.
Second wife - the politician.

Well, you know how the new wife is treated and how the old wife is treated in polygamy. Nigerian Christianity has been pampering this new wife since they got married, completely neglecting the old wife.

Growing up, the sight of specially-designed Italian leather sofas in the front row, reserved for Daddy GO, Mommy GO, politicians, and rich men of power was unthinkable!

The closest that my generation and those older knew about special seating arrangements in the Nigerian church was on ojo ikore, Thanksgiving Day, when the "alaga" of the day sat on a special chair.

Today, sofa apartheid is standard in the church, the quality of your front row sofa determined by the size and regularity of your tithe and the importance of your position in power.

Nigerian Christendom has been grooming the new bride with privileges, preferential treatment, and spatial apartheid in the church. Nigerian Christendom has been stopping in the middle of sermons and ministration to "recognize the presence of Senator Lagbaja and Governor Tamedun." 

Nigerian Christendom has made a colossal contribution to deepening class apartheid in Nigeria by separating rich and powerful men from the masses in Church.

It has been 'give and take' this relationship. Nigerian Christendom has received import waivers.

Nigerian Christendom has received its own share of the looted Commonwealth in the shape of tithes and other donations. 

I used to even think that the rot in Nigerian Christianity was limited to prosperity Pentecostal Churches until Senator Ike Ekweremadu built a church in his state and donated it to the Anglican Communion and the Anglican Church accepted the expensive gift without bothering about the source of the riches of that member of the filthy National Assembly.

When, as Christianity, you have spent nearly three decades grooming Nigerian big men and their wives as special and different from the rest in the context of a class apartheid you created, what exactly do you expect if you depart from the script?

The slighted politician will take a coconut and crack it on your head. If Ambode's story is true, it is a warning to Nigerian Christianity. You wrote the script. You created the class apartheid in Church. Live with the monster you created. Depart from the script and a coconut will be cracked on your head.

When a politician cracks a coconut on the head of a Nigerian pastor, I have no dog in the fight. It is a family affair. I have never been invited to their sharing of the spoils of the Nigerian state. Why should their quarrel be my headache?

It is ordinary people taking sides between politician and pastor that I pity. The politician and the chaplain will kiss and make up eventually.  The tithing of the Pastor will resume.

The privileged sitting arrangements of the politician and his wife will resume. You will be told that God will answer your own prayer by fire one day. Aduraaaaaa!!! With saharareporters.com

Comments

Most Read

Our Photo Of The Day, As Muhammadu Buhari Orders Police To Kill Protesters In Port Harcourt

This is what Muhammadu Buhari and his untrained police did to protesters today in Ph. These are  unarmed protesters shoot by the Nigerian police today.

Virgin Atlantic Airways Exits Nigerian Market, Sacks All Nigerian Cabin Crew, Close Down Call Centre

According to news reports, Virgin Atlantic Airways has laid off all their Nigerian cabin crew. They were only given three weeks notice and no severance package regardless of length of service will be paid. The air-hostesses they sacked were about 20 in number. The company closed down their Nigerian call centre last year and let go of all the Nigerian staffers. The Owner, you would recall had said sometime in 2012, he was weary of doing business in Nigeria. Here is an extract from a statement Richard Branson issued in 2012 after the ill-fated footsteps he took by setting up a new airline in conjunction with the Nigerian government; “We fought daily battle against government agents who wanted to daily make fortune from us, politicians who saw the government 49% as a meal to seek for all kinds of favour…watchdogs (regulatory body) that didn’t know what to do and persistently asking for bribes at any point…Nigeria people are generally nice but the politicians are very insane…that may …

The Semen-Drinking Sambian Tribe Of Papua New Guinea!

To become a man in this primitive Sambian tribe in Papua New Guinea, boys are removed from the presence of all females at the age of seven, living with other males for ten years. The idea here is to convince everyone in the village that he can live without women.The isolation they encounter not only prevent the boys from having any sexual activities with women, but also from seducing, or being seduced by married women. During the ten years, the skin is pierced to remove any contamination brought upon by women. For the same reason, a sharp stick is inserted into the child’s nostrils until he bleeds profusely. They also regularly incur vomiting caused by consuming large amounts of sugarcane.
Older men now tell the boys that the bachelors (warriors) are going to copulate with them orally in order to make them grow. Throughout the six stages of the tribe’s rite of passage, the boy will perform fellatio (blowjob) to these warriors to, ironically, prove he is a real man. Because shoving manh…

Donald Trump Blasts President Buhari, Says His Priority Is The Full Introduction Of Islam, The Annihilation Of His Political Opponents And Absolute Extermination Of The People Of The Old Eastern Nigeria.

I Trust the US Republican presidential hopeful for being blunt! He said; ''no sensible president continuously travels round the globe while his country is in terrible hardship and economic mess.''
He continued; ''It can only happen in Nigeria where all that matters to the President is the full introduction of Islam, annihilation of his political opponents and absolute extermination of the people of the old Eastern Nigeria
Buhari, prior to his questionable victory at the polls as the President of Nigeria made lots of promises which he has obviously failed to keep and in most cases denied.
As a matter of fact, change could either be ‘positive’ OR ‘negative. To the earlier misconception of Nigerians and current state of the economy as a result of initiation of impracticable economic policies, it wouldn’t be wrong to assert that what president Muhammadu Buhari and his All Progressives Congress promised Nigerians was a NEGATIVE CHANGE.
If Nigeria is a country made up of…

#Former President Shehu Shagari Breaks His Silence And Spoke Out For GEJ!

The first Executive president of Nigeria, Alhaji Shehu Usman Aliyu Shagari has broken his silence after 32years of overthrown by General Mohammadu Buhari

This is what he said to AIT news reporter in Sokoto state yesterday;
"Jonathan may not be the best, but I can mention 3 to 4 breakthrough in Nigeria that occurred under his regime.''

''Under this administration, train is now back in Nigeria after about 30yrs of neglect (infact, my 27years old grandchild boarded train for the first time in his life in 2014)'' First Government to construct modern Amajiri schools & 12 Universities.
First Government to construct cargo Airports & ensure all zone in Nigeria has an Int'l airport.

First Government to eradicate the high level corruption in the distribution of fertiliser.
And the very first Government to start diversifying Nigeria economy back to agric after Nigeria lost its agricultural glory in the 70s.

Now I ask, what are Buhari DEVELOPMENTAL…

Couple Show Moment Of Split: Liverpool Boss Brendan Rodgers Said To Have Left His Wife!

Since taking over as Liverpool manager, Brendan Rodgers has undergone an image makeover to match the glamour of one of the top jobs in football. The 41-year-old has apparently had his teeth whitened and lost a noticeable amount of weight, as well as moving from the family home into a £1.2million flat. And he is also reported to have now started seeing a 31-year-old former employee of the club who has been seen at his new property.
The manager, who grew up in Northern Ireland and previously held the top job at Watford and Reading, has adopted a new and more fashionable image in recent months. He has spent thousands of pounds on having his teeth whitened and lost weight after regularly exercising at the club's Melwood training ground. Mr Rodgers has also moved out of the house he shared with wife Susan, according to The Sun's Guy Patrick, and bought a luxury flat in an upmarket suburb of the city for £1.2million. Neighbours told The Sun he has since been visited at the home by …